This is the last time I rewrite the script, I think that apart from a minor tweaks this is going to be the final run.
The story is essentially the same, just cut up ala Tarrantino. Dialogue is nearly non existant, what is there will mostly sound muffled/underwater. Only two or three lines are clear, because they are key to the story.
This version seems to work and its a whole bunch shorter;3 pages, instead of between 6 and 8.
[Edited it again... added dialogue to the last section in the office. Also need to break it into three acts properly, but I'll do that shortly]
So here it be:
Unit 4 Fourth Draft